crime

Owen Courreges: New Orleans in 2017 is becoming a much better place to live — for murderers

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Is there somebody you’re furious with? An embezzling partner, perhaps? An unfaithful lover? A guy who drove too slow in the fast lane?

Well, allow me to present a now-viable option to the quandary of dealing with these miscreants. Murder! Murder will eliminate the problem immediately. Statistics show that over 99% of murdered persons are rendered perfectly innocuous.

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Advertiser: Five Activities Guaranteed to Keep Your Family Active This Summer

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School’s out for summer! It’s time to take advantage of the great weather and activities that make summer one of the most anticipated seasons. If you’re looking for quality programming and events to keep your family active and make this summer memorable, consider visiting your neighborhood park, pool, or rec center.

Every summer NORD provides residents of New Orleans with an array of quality programming, classes, and events, all at no cost. From swimming lessons, family game nights, fishing, canoeing, summer sports leagues, piano, and dance lessons. There is something for everyone.